A smile and a sigh of relief are what describe me tonight as I rest after sketching the design of Henderson, Nebraska's newest mural on the wall of the CVA (formerly CO-OP) building. After an almost 2 year process, the mural is finally underway. Nothing describes it better than perfect timing!
AS with other larger projects, I hope to do a little blogging about my day. Also follow the progress on Facebook and Instagram.
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One year ago this month, I was led on a new adventure. An adventure I didn't see coming, but one I would not trade for anything. As I look back on this past year (beginning in April 2018) I recount the hurt, pain, grief, sorrow, brokenness, misunderstandings, confusion, chaos and the peace, prayers, process, beauty, joy, calm, strength, courage, boldness, understanding, learning, loving, and compassion of situations, relationships, and ultimately time in my studio at home. Old doors closed with a slam and new ones opened slowly. Some doors led to more waiting. Others led to new exciting projects to inspire others and encourage them to dream or dream again. Studio time was process time. New work began to flow out of the pain and mosaics became a way to slowly, methodically, spiritually re-centering, forgiving, praying, and taking steps to heal my broken, hurting heart. I limited myself to just one outing with a friend a week in order to protect my studio time and to make sure my words and heart were in the right place as I left my home. I have come face to face with so much of who I am and who I was made to be this year. I often feel like I'm 19 years old again - out to face the world for the first time. I am learning what I am good at, what I'm not, and trying to walk forward with that knowledge as best as I know how. While winter was painfully long for many of my fellow Nebraska residents, it was a new adventure for me. I felt like a child most days as I explored the newly whitened, snow packed neighborhood in which I live. There was a respite and rest within that season that I found solace in. A quietness in my soul that I long to have define my character from that point forward. I learned the necessity of studio practice for me and regardless of where God will lead me in the seasons ahead, I know that being in the studio on a daily basis (or as close to that as I can) is highly important. When asked what I'm up to these days, I tell folks I'm "making stuff." It's true and it is as simple as that. Whether it is trying out a new mosaic idea, sculpting a new tree relief, working on wax chasing for my dad's sculptures, or any number of crazy other ideas brought my way, I'm making and in that there is much joy. I still don't understand much of what led me to today. I don't need to know it all. I am just simply learning to walk in this day and take it as it comes. There is one word that God has brought to me in this season and for however long this season is I hope I will live by it. That word is AVAILABLE. So wherever this journey goes from today, I'll be ready and willing. Interested in following the process of making? Follow me on Facebook or Instagram (ann.williams831) 6:00 AM Saturday morning: I awoke somehow refreshed and ready for installation. I couldn’t wait to see this go up! Chris decided to tag along for the day so we left around 8 am and began hauling boxes in. Sarah joined us and as we were deciding how to begin we were asked to come to a Live 360 opening breakfast. We were there a half hour or so and then headed back to the installation site. It took us some time to figure out how to hang each rectangle on the first row around the square grid. We took in to consideration the height from the floor of the first row as well as how clean the faces of the rectangles were. It was a process of flexibility for sure. While up on the ladder, the engineer at Gateway came and asked how the grid was working out. He had built it for me and I was blown away at how perfect it was for the piece. It was definitely a God thing. Sarah and I recounted that no where were we concerned about that piece. God had it under control indeed. After chatting a bit, talking with a few friends that came by and processing the next rows, we slowly got the engine running. By noon, we were in full installation mode and again I was not about to stop now that I was focused and in the groove. Sarah and Chris took off for lunch and then came back to start laying out groups of 10 that would add up to 1000. As they approached 900 we couldn’t believe we had strung that many the night before and when all the counting was done, we only needed 58 more! It was amazing considering we still had a small box full of rectangles. So Sarah and Chris made quick work of the rectangles and then Sarah climbed up the ladder to help me finish out the piece. By 4 pm we had placed the final rectangle and were off the ladder staring at the installation overwhelmed and in awe. In moments like these, I have a loss for words. I marvel that the idea in my brain that God so unique put there and the combination of the work of these human hands could create something so breath takingly amazing! Maybe that sounds egotistical, but I don’t mean it to be. I really do stand in AWE and marvel that God would use me to create that. That object of beauty and meaning. A piece that will speak to the need for mentors. A week later a friend of mine text me and told me the piece inspired her to become a mentor again once she was finished with her professional test / schooling. I was again amazed. It was doing what I had intended it to do. I learned that I need people around me in this project. I need their support and help. That Friday night at 1:30 am I went to bed feeling LOVED like I have never felt before. All these people helping when they didn’t have to. All these people staying up late to help when they could’ve chosen otherwise. This, this is what I desire to bring to other artists and to see artists do for one another. So where do Sarah and I go next? Only God knows, but I am praying for more opportunities and open doors and hope someday that people will value artists, not just as givers but also as tradesmen and women choosing to sponsor or support them in their artistic endeavors. Where do I begin to talk about the process of creating “One Thousand?” I guess I should start in the Winter 2017. This is when the marketing director of Gateway Mall and I sat down in her office and she explained a new initiative their corporate office had approved. It was to become Live 360, a community driven initiative to elevate the mall to a community space and not just a place to shop. It was an initiative that that began to play out a vision the General Manager had four to five years back. We had discussed it on many an occasion. It was the early part of the summer when Gateway gathered members of the community together to brainstorm what they could envision happening in the mall. During one of the meeting’s activities, an attendee commented on how many kids in Lincoln were on a waiting list for mentors. BOOM! An idea hit me and I began to explain that I could see an installation of that number placed in Gateway to help people visualize and experience just how many kids that meant. That began the process of “One Thousand.” After the meeting, mall staff, with their corporate managers, sat down and identified projects that they wanted Live 360 to launch with. The installation piece was one of them, so I was contacted and sat down with staff again to discuss the idea further and what I needed to proceed. I said I needed to meet with the mentor organizations to learn about them and hear, from them, what they experience every day. Gateway arranged the meeting and in early July we met with Lighthouse, Team Mates, and Heartland Big Brothers, Big Sisters. I asked questions, listened, took notes, and walked away with the number 1000. One Thousand, it is the number of kids on waiting lists to be paired with a mentor through these organizations. I also learned that the highest need was for male mentors. With that information I left and let it soak in and roll around. I was headed out of town on a trip with my husband and decided to wait to have a final idea until I returned the end of July. But, in God’s perfect timing, I was given an idea to pursue before we left. Then, I was approached by a young gal (Sarah Wanek) who I was working with at church on some murals. She asked me several questions, all of which I flipped over as God had me praying about and opening doors for those very things. One I was praying for had to do with a desire to have one or more apprentices. So, we met, and I pitched my idea for the installation and she was one board! I was excited! After returning from my trip and getting my feet back under me, I met with Gateway again and we were a go. They even provided money for supplies! I began playing around with ways to make 1000 rectangles. I tried clay and realized that that would take me forever. In talking with Jason he suggested I have one of his employees cut them out of sheets of plywood at Innovation Campus. GREAT idea! Plywood would be to heavy, but I remembered I learned about a great material called Komatex in the spring (light weight and paintable) so I pursued that route and worked with a local plastics dealer to get what I needed. It took a little bit of time, but we got the material to Rusty to cut and over a week he had all 1000 pieces to me ready to paint. I started sanding the first pieces exactly one week before installation and on Monday Sarah joined me and we began working tirelessly to prepare the pieces. By Wednesday afternoon we had all but 300 pieces cut, sanded and painted. A few issues came up on Wednesday late and so Thursday was spent making corrections and finally Friday morning all pieces were ready to be strung for the installation the next day. But something on Friday kept postponing my work on the project and finally around 2:30 I got in a groove and started stringing the rectangles. Then 3:30 rolled around and I stopped work to get my son from school. Getting going was a struggle earlier in the day, but by 4:30 pm I had a plan and I started working hard. Sarah joined me around 5 pm and she jumped in working on some rectangles. Somewhere in there I got dinner ready for everyone and people ate as they wanted. I wasn’t about to stop to eat – I was focused and we were going to get this done. Jason showed up at home around 5:00/5:30 with 1000 paperclips that we needed for hooks. He jumped in and started prepping the “hooks.” Then Christopher jumped in to help. As the boys headed off to bed, just Jason, Sarah and I kept working. Then Sarah suggested she call her sister to come help around 10:30 pm. Shortly thereafter, Jena came, was briefed and she began working. Oh the fun of listening to Jena and Sarah as they unpacked Disney movies. Reminded me of my sister and I. We worked feverishly stopping only briefly for ice cream and popcorn. By 1:00 pm we were tired and still had a half box left. Jason and I sent everyone home to rest and by 1:30 pm I flopped down in bed and was OUT! After several months of rest and slower art production, the month of May seems to have kicked everything in to high gear.
Back in November, I was asked to help a colleague out of Louisville, KY plan three Art and Church Track sessions for an upcoming CIVA conference. After several months of discussion and my colleague deciding to take a once in a lifetime trip to Israel, I was left finalizing the details of the conference sessions on my own. What a great test of trust and faith in God’s plan. I feel way out of my league, but am excited for God to do His thing through my own willingness to let Him lead. He is bringing together a great group of speakers / presenters and as a friend of mine prayed, may we stay open to those who need to be invited to share and speak into this discussion. I look forward to sharing with people about building an arts ministry in their own context coming in June. So with, the weight of three, ninety-minute sessions on my shoulders, I decided, why not also submit a paper to the conference. I’ve never written a scholarly paper before and in trying to do so I reached out to CIVA’s executive director, a friend and fellow artist. He said I should think about my musings as a blog and proceeded to put me in contact with someone at CIVA to help make that a reality. Funny how God works through just opening up and being vulnerable! It led to a blog on the website which posted yesterday: http://civa.org/civablog/making-art-in-the-mall/ This blog is a precursor to the very paper I will share late Saturday afternoon at the CIVA conference highlighting the story of how building relationships led to the opportunity to work with Hope Venture and Gateway Mall last summer. I can’t believe the ride God has me on right now. And all I can do is hang out tight and trust in His unwavering ability to provide strength and energy. So what else, could be added? Well God also placed me in the path of a non-profit in Lincoln called LPPAD. Their purpose is to oversee the fundraising, acquisition, and placement of public art in the city. Through a friend connecting me with LPPAD, I was invited to paint live this coming Thursday in Lincoln’s Tower Square (15th and P Street) for the annual Give to Lincoln Day. I will be painting from 10 am to 2 pm on a painting that is inspired by sitting in the space a few Monday mornings ago pondering the man-made elements and plant life there. It leaves me thinking about man’s creations in harmony with God’s creations and how we often miss the beauty of both. But, I see it and God keeps moving in ever surprising and amazing ways. Over the past two years, I have learned an important lesson about perspective, humility and position. God’s Word is True. He opposes the proud….and exalts the humble. God changes the heart if we let Him in and are open to sacrificing this life for His way. Easy when said on this side of the Refiner’s fire – not so easy 8-10 months ago right in the middle of it. God has humbled me to authorities He has placed in my life and given me a heart and passion to serve Him regardless of the cost. May He be seen, may He speak, and may He receive the glory this week, in June at the CIVA conference, and in each new opportunity He brings my way. Since the final sale of the "Collective Individualism" paintings a month ago, I have been receiving requests to make more. Usually when I make a series of paintings and I finish, I'm done. No prints, no additions, no more thought. I move on to the next project. This is somewhat because my goal in creating art is never to generate income. My goal, my purpose is much deeper -- it is to glorify God with my heart, soul, and talent. My fear of falling into the machinist rhythm kept me from considering making more of the tree paintings. Yet, other than a small commission, what was I going to be about in my studio? A few weeks of floating or resting and I was ready to get back in the studio. But doing what type of work? I didn't feel like going back to my usual style of painting and I kept hearing people say -- do you have more of those tree paintings? For some reason, the idea of flipping "Collective Individualism" into a way to build relationships and spark community rings a chord with so many. Now what? Then last Friday, after meeting for a project I will be creating with Eastridge Presbyterian Church on January 8, God spoke to me about the paintings. I had been coaxed and encouraged by a dear friend to make more of these paintings and God used that woman to soften my heart and listen. He revealed my fears through our conversation and on the way home I realized God was telling me the journey with these wasn't over and it was time to make more. MORE? I had all the supplies the last time. More? God reminded me that He provides for every need when He calls. I decided "OK, I'll do it." And I began to get excited. So this morning I'm beginning to stretch new canvases and begin the process of taking "Beyond Collective Individualism" on the next leg of the journey. I am praying for people to join me in this journey to see where God will take this art series. I am thankful for those who've posted their images on Facebook and how God has opened opportunities for the trees to bring people together. One tree painting went to a local school where the kids got to add their thumb prints to it. Other paintings are records of people coming over for soup and good conversation. I look forward to what the next leg of this journey holds. I hope to have another grouping of paintings complete by November 30. Email me if you are interested in a piece (ann@envisiongalleries.com). They will continue to be $25 each and I will ship them anywhere but will charge shipping to cover the cost. FOLLOW THE PROJECT: via blog or follow and like the project on Facebook at Beyond Collective Individualism After several months of waiting, 23 paintings are going on display at Lincoln's Noyes Gallery (119 S. 9th Street) this week. The opening reception is scheduled for Friday October 7 from 6 pm - 9pm. The paintings are part of a series entitled "Collective Individualism." The convex, three-tiered stack of paintings of barren trees represent a scene of people being crowded in one location yet not interacting with one another. Being alone together they are not producing foliage or fruit. The sculpture of paintings can be walked around and into, revealing the backs of each canvas and how they are attached together. Each painting will be on sale on Friday night and throughout the exhibit for $25 each. Once the paintings are purchased and removed, the tower will begin to change and shift. Interaction will begin on a new level as I will then re-stack and build the structure as needed. Each painting will be accompanied by an ink pad and card explaining the piece and what to do with it. Patrons of the pieces are to place their paintings in a special location and as people visit they are encouraged to have them place thumbprints on the tree to create leaves. Through this process, the tree will begin to come alive and speak to connectedness and moving toward community. The trees then become symbols of family and interaction. The project has its own Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/beyondcollectiveindividualism/ This is where buyers of the paintings are to post images of the progress of the "growth" of their trees. If you are interested in following the progress after Friday search for the page and "like" it. On a Side NOTE: I'm excited to be part of the exhibit this coming Friday as it was put together by a woman I have had the opportunity to walk with in the arts for almost 10 years. She is really taking off in her artwork and she is the one who organized this exhibit. She also invited several artists friends of hers, many who she has met through involvement with the visual arts at Lincoln Berean Church. We look forward to sharing our art with Lincoln and patrons of Noyes Gallery. At 4 pm today the Sixteen Days of Hope was officially over. The hard work of the past two plus weeks came to a close with the visit of a friend. She came at the moment I needed it most. She had followed the process and prayed for me from the beginning and it was the best ending I could've asked for.
My prayer today was to finish strong. To not neglect the people roaming around at Gateway, to interact with them, and to finish with just as much gusto as I started. Fewer people at Gateway stopped to ask questions about the project today. Many just enjoyed watching the detail work being done to finish up the panels. Most were interested in where the panels were going and asked about the white lines coming from the tree. I was happy to share that the roots would be finished at Hope Venture's fundraiser on October 21 at Chey Hay. My favorite encounter today was to meet a lady from Denver only to find out a bit later that she was related to a gal I work with at Lincoln Berean. I love how moments like that happen. I think God smiles when He shows us little connections and we delight in them. I saw many a person approach the mosaic with the eyes and excitement of a child. I love watching people light up, learn, and experience pieces of artwork. I have enjoyed my time at Gateway. I have met many new people and made some new friends. I will miss my station by the food court, but am ready to walk the next journey of this art piece. At 6 pm the panels were removed from Gateway Mall, loaded into my husband's truck and transported to my studio at home. Less that a dozen pieces came off the mosaic, most had not been previously glued. They had only been set on, not glued, and forgotten. When we arrived at home, my husband and I unloaded each panel and set them in our dining room until the fundraiser. I have to say that I have been blessed with an amazing husband who supports all the crazy art projects I get myself in to. He is always willing to haul pieces here or there despite their odd shape or size. And he does it all without complaint. I probably have a harder time asking for his help than he does in actually providing help. And without him, this project wouldn't have happened on the most basic, behind-the-scenes level. I'm thankful to him for "holding down the fort" during the past two weekends while I've been at Gateway. Tonight, as this chapter of making art closes, I am thankful for all the people that helped, visited, listened, learned, gave, prayed, followed, encouraged, and supported during this project. It was because of you that this project truly was Sixteen Days of Hope. THANK YOU. Just about complete. With the help of volunteers from Hope Venture, friends, families, and artists the mosaic is just about finished. We would've finished the green had we not run out of larger pieces of glass. And thanks to someone I met last weekend when she came to work on the project, we will have green to finish up tomorrow. I am amazed at the generous spirit of people, from the giving of materials to the purchasing of caffeine so I could keep working. Today, many people returned to the mosaic to help place more pieces of glass. Some had come last weekend or the first weekend. They expressed their desire to come back because they had enjoyed their previous time working. Others came early in the process today, put a few pieces on, and then came back later and added more.
Each section of the mural holds the story of those who worked on it. I know I've said that before, but I look at the mosaic now and see those stories again. Like the image from today of the little green pieces. A young mother and her three girls came and spent quite a while with us placing glass. We were running out of large pieces but that didn't deter the four. One young gal, maybe 8 years old, had so many questions for me. Her mom shared, in somewhat broken English, that her daughter loved art and anything like what we were doing. I had to say that their visit was a highlight and also one of the challenges of the day. Artistically, it was hard for me to watch people do their "own thing" on the mosaic again after spending such an intense and productive week on it mostly by myself. Yet this is the nature of this project and I knew I had to learn to cope with it. Now, after a few hours, my emotions have mellowed and I think those places of the mosaic are what make it special. It makes it what it is and speaks of the community it has taken to create it. Over the past few days, I have been astounded by the number of artists I have connected with through the project. Since part of what I'm called to do is to lead and encourage artists, it has been such a pleasure to meet new folks in our community who are creative. These artists are young, old, mosaic artists, painters, sculptors, wood workers, photographers, film makers, and even retired art teachers. The project has drawn people who work construction, teach, lead, work insurance, you name it, I've met them. Grandparents with grandkids, dads with their kids, moms and daughters, brides and their fiances, and all other sorts of relationships are represented in this mosaic. The mosaic is an experience these people have together and they won't soon forget it. My favorite was the fathers and their daughters, especially those who let their girls work, stood back for awhile, then jumped in, and 30 plus minutes later when I looked over - they were still there working! That is sweet, especially when you learn that dad only sees daughter once in a while. It's humbling to think they would spend their precious time together creating art. Community sums up the day and many days of this mosaic. In so many ways I can't even express them all at this time. But I am thankful for people and I have learned so much from this project. And now off to have a bowl of ice cream and get rested so I can return to Gateway tomorrow at noon for the final hours of the project. The day was somewhat normal for this project. Family, friends, facebook followers, and more stopped to chat about the project and Hope Venture. "Jo" got his hug like the days before. I also now chat with one of the food court cleaning crew. Though he is a bit hard to understand, we talk about our work and bowling. For the most part, the day went by quickly as I worked on the ground of the mosaic, small spaces in the blue areas, and filling in the green in the center panel. I worked hard to get the piece ready for the final public work day tomorrow. Just two days of work left and the panels will leave the mall until they are hung in early November.
Some of my family visited today and it got me thinking about who has impacted my life through the years. I also thought about the jobs I've had that have helped play a role in who I am today and what I do as an artist. I can say that many people and experiences, good and bad, are part of who I am. I am thankful for each moment, challenge, and person who has influenced my life. Some people who I've met this week will be included in those who have influenced and challenged me. Many have shared their stories with me and provided encouragement. As I've already said, today went smoothly until about 2 pm. A friend who'd stopped by to help left for an appointment and I struggled to stay working for the next hour. I wanted to leave and go do something for me. I had an errand to run and get my kids from camp and I just wanted to leave. Several times, I thought about it and every time I sense God wanting me to stay, encouraging it. I struggled but kept working. Again I wanted to go but felt compelled to stay -- and not in a fun way. It was hard to stay focused on working for the next hour. Then at 3 pm my alarm went off signalling it was time to go, and that's when the afternoon got interesting. As I put supplies away, I saw two people come to where I was working. As I started a conversation explaining Hope Venture, I saw one women clinch her mouth together and form a stern or disconcerted look on her face. I knew she was questioning what I was saying. I sensed it had something to do with sending money overseas. As polite as she was trying to be, I drew her out. I asked her what she was thinking and she hesitated. I told her I really wanted to know and she proceeded to let me know she wasn't supportive of what I was doing and that we had problems here to solve. As I had experienced something like this earlier in the project, I tried hard to keep my mouth shut. This time I was told how poorly some Veterans are treated. Again, I learned the story. Family members unable to support themselves and a government program not helping. After listening for 20 minutes or so, they had to go and I was able to leave. By this point, I was overwhelmed and exhausted. I drove out to get my kids from camp in silence trying to process this day. When I made it home, I found my husband already there. I couldn't help but emotionally unload. I was tired and raw from the last conversation. This was the first time in 14 days I cried. Tears of burden for the people in all sorts of pain and those who are looking for the answers. Also the reality of our selfish human natures that seek benefit for our own well being and failure to see those deeply in need. And yet, in the muck and mire of it all, God sent His Son. Amazing. And He not only came to save us, but to call us to take part in His work of redeeming His world. Meaning we don't work for God's approval, we work out of a relationship with Him. We work with Him! He calls broken, unlikely people to step up in faith and share in the joy of His news of Hope. And let me say being used by Him is an adventure and amazing experience I wish for each and every reader of this. He has a purpose for you. Just seek Him, He will show you, and it will be incredible. |
AuthorAnn has worked as a professional artist since 2006. She currently works on her own studio artwork as well as large, commercial works and with other artists in any way she can. Archives
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